We have a running joke in our Church with a dear older gentleman who is greatly beloved by us. I often tease him, saying that it will be his turn to preach next week. He always responds with a, "Well, I've got a dentist appointment on that day." What's funny about that is that he doesn't have any teeth-just the false ones.

But that is so like someone who is paranoid. They make these wild and crazy reasons not to do something. They can even make themselves sick so that they have a reason not to face their particular fear.

SYMPTOM #2 - YOU CREATE NEW OBSTACLES SO YOU DON'T HAVE TO FACE YOUR FEAR

In other words, even if someone is willing to take care of an obstacle for you, you will simply come up with another one, and then another one, and then another one, not to face your fear.

A common analogy is two young men deep in a conversation about a girl.

"You ought to ask her out," the first says, all serious and business like.

The second's eyes widen and his gaze turns upon the unsuspecting girl. "No way," he mutters. "She doesn't like me!"

"Yes she does," the first insists. "I talked to her friend."

The second turns slightly pale. "But she wouldn't like me once she got to know me."

"You don't know that. Look, let's go over there. I'll break the ice."

"No! Now's not a good time." He clutches at his stomach. "I'm not feeling so good."

This type of conversation happens all the time. The subject changes, the setting changes, but the paranoia is very real. Someone who is paranoid about rejection will react just as I described him. Take away every obstacle and they'll still come up with one.

SYMPTOM # 3 - YOU IMAGINE PERSECUTION WHERE NONE EXIST OR THE REALITY IS SIGNIFICANTLY LESS THAN YOUR IMAGINATION

Paranoia has its roots in emotions that are best described as aggressively defensive. A paranoid person will imagine slights, insults, dislike, and hatred where none exist. Make a comment on their hair style and they'll take it as some sort of subtle insult. Compliment them on how good of a job they did, and they'll feel threatened.

They worry about things that don't exist. Someone paranoid about driving will imagine that every other driver out there is some sort of diabolical insane person out to crash into him. Or they imagine that they'll crash every time they get behind the wheel as if the car itself was evil or possessed.

Paranoia can take many forms and latch on to many different things.

SYMPTOM #4 - YOUR DECISIONS BECOME CONTRADICTORY, CONFUSING, AND OFTEN ILLOGICAL.

Your excuses and obstacles won't make much sense to other people. Paranoia doesn't allow for clear thinking. Someone who is paranoid uses emotions for every aspect of the decision. In fact, they'll contradict themselves frequently, change their minds, can't seem to make up their minds, will second guess themselves, and justify their actions with faulty logic.

You know you're paranoid when you can't seem to ever make up your mind. You'll start, change your mind, and then change it again. You become so wrapped up in the potential consequences of your decision that you become unable to make it.

CONCLUSION

These are four of the most common symptoms of paranoia.

If, after reading this, you think this might be you, but then change your mind, then change it again, or you made a dozen excuses as to why this can't possibly be you, or you think that I've written this just to make you feel bad, then you are paranoid.

Greg S. Baker is a Pastor, Counselor, and Author specializing in building and strengthening relationships.

For more books and resources on how to communicate better, express yourself, and strengthen social skills, please visit our website at: http://www.fitlyspoken.org

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Names such as: Sixes are the: Loyal Person, Devil's Advocate, Faithful Skeptic, Guardian, or True Believer are commonly used to decribed the Temperaments Types. We use numbers instead of any names.

We use numbers to designate each of the Temperament Types because numbers are value neutral. They imply the whole range of attitudes and behaviors of each Temperament without specifying anything either positive or negative.

The numerical ranking of the Types is not significant. A larger number is no better than a smaller number.

No Temperament Type is inherently better or worse than any other. While all the Temperament Types have unique assets and liabilities, some Types are often more desirable than others in our society. You may not be happy with your particular Type. You may feel that your Type is “limited" in some way. As you learn more about all the Types, you will see that just as each has unique capacities, each has different “limits.”

People do not change from one basic Temperament Type to another. Some Types are more valued in our society than others; it is because of the qualities that society rewards, not because of any superior value of those Types.

The descriptions of the Temperament Types apply equally to males and females, since no Type is inherently masculine or feminine. Not everything in the description of your basic Type will apply to you all the time because you fluctuate constantly.

Why aren’t all people with a given Temperament Type successful?

You probably know a bunch of people with the same Temperament Type. Why are some successful and others are not. Why the difference? The difference is Emotional Intelligence. We use Emotional Quotient. (EQ) as a shorthand to describe Emotional Intelligence.

A person may have a high IQ. They did well in school, maybe have a college diploma or even an advanced degree. They may even be in MENSA, the select high-IQ club and still fail in business and relationships. Why are they not successful?

The answer:

Your IQ determines 20 % of your success, which leaves 80% to other forces. This is stated by Daniel Goleman the Author of “Emotional Intelligence.”

A person with a high IQ does not mean they know how to manage their thoughts and feelings any more successfully than a person with a low IQ. Success requires taking the emotional data, making sense of that data, and integrating it into your decision-making. People with higher EQ does this better.

By increasing your EQ you can use your thoughts and emotions of your Temperament Type to make the best possible decisions. Increased EQ help you get optimal results from your relationships with yourself and others.

EQ challenges the conventional belief that emotions are in the way of good decisions. By increasing your EQ it is possible to learn how to use your emotions to make better decisions. By increasing your EQ, it is possible to increase your wisdom and energy required for high performance. The Increasing your EQ is a teachable life skill. If people get better at these life skills, everyone benefits: The brain doesn't distinguish between being a more empathetic manager and a more empathetic father

The Just Wait Teen Program The teenagers of the Just Wait Teen™ program  are exposed to the information and research concerning their Happiness, their Temperaments, their Talents, their Attributes, their Gifts and how to maintain long term relationships. The Just Wait Teen™ program  is life enhancing program, not a substance rehabilitation program. Although its' objective is to give the teens tools and understandings to reach 21 years - substance free. This Program was developed by the Just Wait Foundation a 501 (c)(3) nonprofit corporation to prevent drug, alcohol, and tobacco problems among teenagers. The Foundation provides one-year scholarships (two semesters) at a Community College or $1000 award to teens that completes the 4 year Just Wait Teen™ Positive Youth Development Program, obtains a GED, or graduates from high school - alcohol, tobacco, and drug free. The Just Wait Foundation has arranged to use of 80 acres to raise fruit and vegetables to finance the scholarships We offer free training for any person or group that wants to start this program in their community. Contact Us    Copyright 2009  - 2010 & Developed by  Just Wait Teens